Crocs: You’ll never want to take them off, so long as you don’t look down or have friends who point them out, snicker and question your judgment to your face.
Seriously. They are ugly. They’re not even tolerably ugly like cheap flip-flops or Vibrams (Arguable point for Fang). They’re just goddamn ugly. Don’t pretend you like the humpbacked, chunky-and hole-filled clogs from hell. You don’t and your feet don’t either.
For some reason that we can’t fathom, Crocs have spread like the clap around the globe and are no longer just for unfortunately dressed German tourists.
Because Crocs are the gift that won’t stop giving, one company has apparently decided to jump into the fray by creating a dog bed that is shaped like a Croc. For serious.
Do you hate your dog? You sure? That says “I hate myself and my little dog too”. We already know about the stupid decorative pins (Nothing can fix the ugly that are those) and the fancy dress crocs which almost look like real shoes (You can’t fool us, foam-manufacturing heathens) but this… this has gone too far. Leave the dogs alone.