You may have noticed. We’re pissy people. Shit annoys us. Here’s a short list of what’s annoying us lately. We reserve the right to expand on any of them later.
1. Using Acronyms and industry-babble you don’t really have a grasp on .
LAM, LAT, BAT, CC/DS, OC, R+, P-, VSR, DOR, and so on. We get that acronyms are an easy way to remember complex terms, but if you are using multiple in one sentence it just becomes alphabet soup. And if you don’t understand these terms and continue to throw them around, we’ll notice. It doesn’t make you look smart to toss around acronyms at a rapid-fire pace…it just makes it look like you are trying too hard. We have a fun acronym that should maybe be inserted into some of the more acronym-laced forums we read….STFU.
2. Using Hopeless cases as the mascot of your rescue.
You know what’s great for getting dogs adopted? Social media exposure. Seriously, it does wonders. You know what doesn’t help? Keeping a dog alive just so it can push your rescue. For every four thousand dollar drive you have for that albino, blind/deaf chihuahua with a seizure disorder, cleft palate, legless, with a hole in its heart you could save ten other perfectly happy healthy dogs. We get that people are dumb, they need a case to put their money behind but you are prolonging the suffering of that dog. Stop it.
3. Stop posting pictures of horribly abused dogs on Facebook
Bombarding your Facebook friends with graphic images accomplishes one thing. It makes us want to de-friend you or block your posts. It’s not that we aren’t sensitive to the plight of abused animals, but there are better ways to raise awareness than making us ill whenever we log on to Facebook. In fact, just about anything is more effective than clogging up Facebook feeds of people who ignored you in high school. Talk to your legislature about increasing penalties for animal abuse, be on the lookout for animal abuse in your own neighborhood, talk to your children about the proper way to treat animals. And if you must post a story on Facebook, please leave the photo out.
4. Over-using the word “reactive”
Let’s look at the word first. Reactive. Google tells us it means showing a reaction to a stimulus. So, unless your dog is catatonic or dead, let’s hope he is reactive. Go ahead, go poke him. We’ll wait. Did your dog wake up? Good. We all have reactive dogs, let’s invest in front hook harnesses and pounds of beef liver. We kid, we kid. Every tool has a use, blah blah blah. Your dog barking or even snapping at a rude dog in its space? Yeah, that’s reactive. That’s also PERFECTLY normal. We’ve touched on that, we won’t rehash it here. Your dog isn’t just reactive to dogs that get all up in his business, you say? He’s willing to go over a fence and chase a dog down eighty yards? Well then your dog isn’t just reactive, he’s over reacting and he’s being an asshole. Stop blaming it on the latest buzz-word in dog training.
5. Baiting fights in internet forums by mentioning Cesar Millan.
“That was a really productive Cesar conversation!” said no one ever. For real. We know that he is a controversial figure and that there are clear factions for and against him, but we’re pretty sure that every possible talking (yelling?) point has been touched on by now, so continuing to post questions in dog forums like “What do you think about Cesar Millan” is just asinine. Do you really think there will be some breakthrough the 10 millionth time people get in internet screaming matches over him? Probably not, but you do know you are sure to get a lot of responses. We can’t help but think that people who frequently post about him are just giant attention whores.
6. Analyzing Dog Body Language in one photo.
A Picture’s Worth a Thousand Words, right? That doesn’t mean we need a damn essay on someone else’s photo just because you can see the white of one of the eye’s of the dog. Unless someone asked for your advice… It’s none of your damn business. Follow thumper’s rule, This isn’t a one man/woman crusade to save every dog from every uncomfortable photographed moment. It’s one moment in time, and you have no idea of the situation… calm down.
7. Calling balanced training abuse.
Everyone is allowed to have an opinion, and when it comes to dog training… everyone does. That’s cool, we have an opinion too. What you SHOULDN’T do is call a training method you don’t agree with “abusive”. We’d show you actual abuse but that violates rule three. When you use it to describe a training method, you cheapen the word.
8. Making shit up.
The internet is a vast and wondrous place, made smaller by search engines like Google. It’s pretty darn easy to figure out if people’s stories are inconsistent with the truth, or at least with what they have said on other internet platforms. You’re calling your dog a wolf hybrid on one forum when you’ve previously referred to them as a purebred Akita on another forum? You say your dog has titled in AKC? Your dog saved the mayor of a small town by rescuing him from a well (oh wait, that’s Lassie)? Guess what…it’s pretty easy to confirm.
9. Make Animated Dog/People Hybrids
Nothing creeps us out more than those weird animations where you can put your dog’s head on a human body and post it all over dog forums. We really don’t need to see your Shiba as a Rockette or your Lhasa as a sexy nurse. That type of thing should stay relegated to the dark corners of the internet along with squid porn.
10. Publicly Shaming/Judging people on the origin of their dog.
Can we repeat the “none of your damn business” thing one more time? If you must judge, judge silently. If the dog came from a shitty breeder, it’s too late to do anything about. If it came from a good breeder and you wanted it to come from rescue, It’s STILL too late and you’d be an asshole. If it came from a rescue and you think it should have come from a breeder, you’re probably an even bigger asshole. Moral of the story is, you’re not going to change someone’s mind about their dog by publicly flaming them. So just stop.