Not uncommon in the dog world, most of us are familiar with the More Money Than Sense (MMTS) owner. The MMTS is the love-child of the Know it All Novice and the Baffled Amateur. While they may not have the answer, they know who does and his name, ladies and gents, is Benjamin.
That’s right kids. While the rest of the unwashed masses are finding ways to cut corners or DIY-it, the MMTS is tossing out money like a broken slot machine.
Erm. Where do rich people go? The country club? Ibiza? Basically anywhere other than working with their own dogs. Is In The Company of Dogs a location? How about Drs. Foster and Smith? The MMTS’s credit card certainly gets a workout on those sites. The MMTS never bothers to shop around, if it’s expensive, it must be good… right?
White linen pants and other completely impractical clothing for being around dogs.
Hypoallergenic breeds, rare breeds, breeds that match their upholstery
Low with strange savant moments. Having thrown money at just about every dog-related issue, the MMTS owner lacks the most basic of dog skills. They are, however, skilled at hiring people do the work for them and then complaining when it’s not done to their unrealistic standards. That being said though, they will frequently surprise you with their vast knowledge on one particular aspect of dog care.
“Surely we can hire someone for that”, “I paid good money for this”, “If I pay you more, can you teach him to love me?”
An old neighbor of mine definitely fit the bill of a MMTS owner. Between paying WAY too much for a pet-quality dog, sending the dog off to a 6 week “bootcamp” (TWICE!!) to improve his manners, and going through dog trainers like toilet paper, this owner spent more time throwing money at the “problem” than actually interacting with his own dog. He never quite seemed to understand why his dog wasn’t perfect despite having spent so much time in training with the “best of the best”. Um, dude, maybe it’s because YOU haven’t actually done the training with your dog or followed up on anything the trainers told you to do. Just a thought…
Much to my own shame, I work for a MMTS owner. Since I’d like to keep that job, I won’t talk about that here. I can, however, talk about another MMTS owner I know. This dog has OTB (only the best) food, collars, leashes… She goes to a vet about two hours away because nothing close by is good enough. When she was told that the dog was getting too fat, instead of exercising the dog like any normal human being, she sent the dog off to a fat camp. Barking problems? Two weeks of board and train. The dog is a short haired beast that could easily be washed in a sink but instead goes to the groomer weekly. When you work in the dog industry, these people can be both a curse and a blessing.
Know a MMTS owner? Willing to admit to being one? Tell us in the comments!